Does that not sound like the absolute greatest thing EVER!!?? Let me answer that for you...yes..yes it does. Who the fuck doesn't want to meet Ava Devine & Mika Tan?!?
(Not that i'm into porn or anything ;)
For some odd reason I could not find one single person to go to this with me! Everyone was either studying, recovering from a bender or just plain lazy. Unforgivable!! I'm not the type of guy who goes to bars to ogle porn stars and get trashed by himself. So with a heavy heart and a tear down my cheek I was forced to go for plan B.
My friend Anna (who I mentioned in my last post) invited me to a party in Tribeca. One thing about her invites is that she usually tells me initially that we're going somewhere with an open bar...and then there is none. Or she'll say that there's no cover charge...and then I pay $15 at the door. That sorta' thing. So when she told me we were going to a party with an open bar and no cover charge I knew to expect the opposite.
I couldn't figure out what the hell kind of event we were at. It was some kind of benefit for a play, I think? They had a silent auction where you could sign up to win things like a tour and backstage passes to the Colbert report and a spa getaway and whatnot. There were performers every now and then also. A really horrible, unfunny yet hot young asian magician/comedian. And then a USO type gay guy singing army songs or some shit. It was just weird man, weird.
I had to get hammered to deal with this oddness. I was talking to Anna's boyfriend most of the time. He's this really hunky half japanese guy. He's some up and coming movie producer. Nice guy. Some other friend of Anna's came with us. I forget her name but somehow we went from discussing her psychology sessions to tango dancing in the middle of the party (I actually know some moves, no fake)
It was okay overall. I did some shmoozing with some other industry types and had my dinner at the free buffet. I almost convinced the gang to go back to Brooklyn for the porn thing. But they decided against it at the last minute (WTF!?) and we ended up just walking to the next bar. A little spot where some friend of theres was working. So at least we got to drink free for a little bit.
One of the bartenders at this next place was so hilariously drunk that I couldn't help but laughing. She was wearing a big Chevy's style sombrero and slurring and spilling drinks. Now that's the kind of girl for me! Reminded me of my ex actually. (Haha! Hi Esther!)
I was pretty drunk at this point and was having some sort of deep conversation with Anna's boyfriend and decided he was awesome. He wanted to hook me up with the bartender but I think I chickened out.
Soon after, the 3 of us pulled the ol' irish goodbye and cabbed it back to union square. I hopped on the subway and into the night I went. The last real night of spring break was over.
I had to overdo it of course. After getting off at my stop I discovered that my local liquor store has 16 ounce Crazy horse cans for 75 cents.
Boo-yah!
Drunk.
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